What You Need to Know About Your Parents' Finances

For some people it’s difficult to talk about finances.  Most people, especially elders, believe that it’s nobody’s business but their own.  This can lead to a difficult conversation, but one that needs to be conducted with any aging relative whom you may need to care for. 

  • Have they named someone to have a durable power of attorney to manage their finances? 

The first step is to find out if they have named a Durable Power of Attorney (POA). Without a POA in place, you'll have to go to court to get guardianship of your parent in order to access accounts on their behalf. 

The difference between a power of attorney and a durable power of attorney is a simple, but extremely important one.  A power of attorney becomes ineffective when your elderly parent becomes incapacitated or loses competency to make their own decisions, usually due to a stroke, Alzheimer’s disease, or other health related complications.  A durable power of attorney becomes effective when your elderly parent becomes incapacitated.  If you need to know which you have or need one drafted, please consult a qualified Elder Law attorney. 

  • Where do they keep their financial records? 

Whether they keep their money and documents in a bank, a safe, or under the mattress, you need to know where to find records when you need them. You will also need codes and keys to any safes or other places they may keep their records and assets. 

  • What are their bank account numbers and names of their financial institutions?

In addition to knowing where they keep their money, you need specifics on all account numbers. You will also need to know: what banks they use, their mortgage company, the names of any investment firms they use, as well as information about retirement and pension accounts (IRAs, 401k, etc.)

  • What are your parent's monthly expenses?

Gather information on their mortgage, car payment, credit card debt, electric bills and other household expenses.

  • How do they pay their bills?

If there are automatic deductions being taken out of a checking account then you need to know about them as well. You will need to know if they bank and pay bills online or by personal check. 

  • How much is their annual income and where does it come from? 

You will need to know about any alimony, disability benefits, Veteran’s Assistance, investment dividends, rents, pension check, and any other sources of income. 

  • Do they receive Medicare, Medicaid, or Social Security?

If your parent becomes incapacitated, you may have to investigate the status and eligibility of government assistance.  Eligibility in these programs are largely dependent upon meeting a means test based on assets and income.  Please speak to a qualified Elder Law attorney about planning for and apply to these programs.  It is better to plan sooner rather than later. 

  • What kind of medical health insurance do they have in addition to Medicare?

You will need to know if they have health insurance provided by an employer, if health benefits included as part of a pension, and if they are receiving VA benefits. 

  • Do they have long-term care insurance? 

A "regular" health insurance plan does not cover the cost of assisted living or a nursing home. You will need to know if they purchased a long-term care insurance policy to cover the cost of those residences.  This is usually referred to as a “Medigap.”  If not, and they can no longer live on their own, you need to know what you or they can afford in terms of housing.

  • Do they have an accountant or financial planner? 

Who is it and how do you contact them? Have they done any estate planning?

The National Council on Aging suggests that planning for this situation should begin in your parent's early 60s with a family council meeting. But for many, that time has passed without that meeting and it is up to family caregivers to provide the best safety net they can.

Health Information Checklist

Having up-to-date medical information for your parent(s) helps you to manage health care and medications. It is crucial to have in case of an emergency.

Use this checklist to make sure you have all of the pertinent information about your elderly parents’ health readily available in one place.

  • Parent's date of birth
  • Parent's Social Security number
  • Medicare/Medicaid information
  • Health insurance information (name, phone number, policy information)
  • Primary care doctor (name, phone number and location)
  • Specialists (name, phone number and location)
  • Medication (name, dosage, time of day taken)
  • Over-the-counter supplements (name, dosage, frequency taken)
  • Medical history (past illnesses and surgeries)
  • Family medical history (illnesses, causes of death for mother, father, siblings

Use this Printable Health Information Checklist from AgingCare.com

Many people consider information and decisions about their health to be highly sensitive and deserving of the strongest protection under the law. So, when it comes to your parent's healthcare, the law is very strict about who is able to participate in healthcare-related conversations and decisions.

Many people never think about their views and values regarding end-of-life decisions until a crisis hits – the time when decision-making is most difficult. Not planning in advance means that you might not be able to gain access to the information you need.  This can inhibit your ability to act on your parent's behalf if they are unable to act for themselves. In a worst-case scenario, you might be forced to fight in court for guardianship, a time-consuming and costly process, when time is of the essence. You can avoid this by working with your parent and an Elder Law attorney to prepare these documents.

HIPAA Authorization

The Health Information Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) keeps a person's health information and records private. Unless your parent authorizes, in writing, someone else to receive that information it is illegal for doctors to share any details with you about your parent's health. A HIPAA authorization is a simple document that authorizes the doctor to share necessary information with you on your elderly parent's behalf. It's very short and only takes a moment to complete.

Health-Care Proxy

Also known as a Medical Power of Attorney or Power of Attorney for Healthcare, a health-care proxy is a legal document that enables you to make health-care decisions for your elderly parent in the event they are unable to make those decisions themselves. This document must be prepared while your parent is still mentally competent to do so.

The designated person has the power to make all health care decisions for your elderly parent. To avoid the difficulties associated with making joint decisions, only one person can be given authority to act on your parent's behalf. An alternate person may be designated at the time the Health Care Proxy is prepared in the event the first person is unable or unwilling to serve.  It is usually a good idea to have an alternate named in the document in the event that the designated person cannot or will not serve as the proxy or in cases of abuse of the Power of Attorney.

It is crucial that the person who is named health-care proxy know what the elderly parent's wishes are in the event that they need life support, a feeding tube or intravenous fluids to survive. This is why the patient's living will or Advance Care Directive is a very important document to have.

It is also crucial that the person named as the proxy knows their obligations as a fiduciary to the elderly parent.

Advance Health Care Directive

This is commonly known as a living will. An Advance Health Care Directive lets people make their own end-of-life care decisions before a medical crisis strikes, even if they are unable to communicate their own wishes. With a living will, the caregiver and other loved ones don't have to agonize over difficult medical decisions. A living will should spell out: 

  • Whether the person wants to be resuscitated if he or she stops breathing
  • Whether artificial life support should be used
  • Whether a feeding tube should be inserted

A living will may indicate specific care or treatment the person does or does not want performed under specific circumstances.

Plan Ahead

Once a healthcare emergency strikes, it will probably be too late to prepare these documents, so talk to your parent about getting their affairs in order and spell out their wishes regarding healthcare while they are still healthy.

Consult an attorney specializing in elder law who will prepare these items and can provide advice on additional planning tools, depending on your family's circumstances.